TAXES: Forget “Pay to Play”. I Say, “Pay to Poo”.


toilet paper

Deep Thoughts on Conservation And Taxes

Ever since I can remember, people have bitched about paying taxes.  We have no problem using  roads, bridges, public facilities, services, police/fire departments, parks, education and amenities that taxation provides, we just don’t want to pay for them.

As a result, we tax all manner of things, which when combined, creates a burden many consider odious, even criminal.  We have tax cheats and conscientious objectors.  I’m mot rich, yet I’ve never voted down a bond or tax issue.  If you don’t pay taxes, you shouldn’t get the benefits they provide.  Don’t use roads, water, don’t vote.  Grow your own food, make your own booze, etc.

The argument over taxation is stupid. Tax codes are stupid–and inherently unfair.  Some  folks will always find loopholes to avoid paying their fair share.. “Sin taxes” discriminate.  Why should smokers and drinkers pay for stuff  we all use?

Some say a flat tax is the answer and on its face there seems logic in that–but the rich will soon find ways to buy offshore, in bulk, avoiding sales taxes.  They’ll shop at Sam’s Clubs in the Caymans, with money drawn from tax-free, local bank accounts–or they’ll find some other way around paying their fair share.  That’s what they do. They’re proud of it.

For decades, I’ve had the solution to our tax problems–toilet paper.

We all use it. We all need it. It’s made at the sacrifice of a precious, natural resource, trees.  In fact, tax anything made from trees.  Use a portion of the revenue to reforest.  Use another to research a disposable diaper that actually disintegrates quickly rather than create an environmental hazard that will make us seem to those who follow us as a culture built on diapers and feminine napkins.

Paper cups, plates, towels, all get taxed more.  Plastic trash bags, which interfere with the decomposition of organic and  paper goods in landfills–also taxed higher. With the internet, we don’t really need catalogs.  Fancy paper stocks with expensive varnish and UV coatings that jam our mailboxes and extend their landfill lives-are all taxed higher.

Petroleum products that deteriorate slowly–Styrofoam, packing peanuts, bubble wrap, plastic six-pack thingies, water bottles, plastic containers, all should demand higher taxes.  As this will compel consumers to cut down on products available only in environmentally-unfriendly packaging,  manufacturers will be forced to research cheaper, green alternatives. Make people pay for ALL shopping bags.  No more “plastic or paper”.

And remember pay toilets? Bring `em back. When you gotta go, you gotta go. We’ll all carry some change if there is no other option.

Encourage composting. Provide incentives to consumers who want to compost, set up service-oriented companies that will compost for a fee. Use what we now throw away.

It’s not rocket science. Tax things we all need, that we all use.  Make us pay more to poo. Apply that logic across the board to stimulate development of green alternative packaging and practices.

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